Taking time to rest

I think cats and dogs have it sussed. They know how to rest. They prioritise luxuriating by a cosy fire, or finding a little nook to snuggle up in for hours in a day.

Now most of us don’t have the option to sleep all day. Or spend hours curled up in front of a fire gazing out into the wilderness.

We need to find moments of rest when we can.

In fact when we go to sleep at night might not be when we have our best quality rest. Many people have disturbed sleep, having young children, life changes and worries are among some of the reasons we don’t always sleep well or wake up feeling refreshed. In fact 1 in 5 of us just aren’t getting enough sleep (taken from Mental Health UK).

During the winter months we can feel even more tired with the lack of sunlight in our day.

Sleep is obviously important “The brain stores new information and gets rid of toxic waste. Nerve cells communicate and reorganize, which supports healthy brain function. The body repairs cells, restores energy, and releases molecules like hormones and proteins”. I’ll share more in a future blog, but for now lest focus on rest in our day.

Taking rest is way that you can down regulate your nervous system (if you took my sleep course this might sound familiar) and this in turn can have positive effects.

Our nervous system will fluctuate during our day. Think about when you get a stressed email from your boss, or you have a looming deadline to meet, or a blind date you might feel excited, nervous, stressed out, and you will most probably be experiencing sympathetic nervous system (SNS) tone also know as flight or fright.

What about after that big Christmas dinner and you are ready for a big nap, or after a restorative yoga class, you will most likely more parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) tone commonly referred to as rest and digest.

The way that many of us live our lives means that with the help of Santa Claus length to do lists, caffeinated drinks and deadlines to meet we might spend more time in SNS.

Finding ways to rest in our day can be hugely helpful. Even just 10 minutes of rest can help you to move towards PNS, and have a positive effect on the rest of your day.

Some things I like to do to take me into that restful, and PNS state.

• Conscious breathing

• Yoga Nidra

• Restorative postures

• Sitting in nature with no distractions listening and seeing the environment around

• Sitting in silence

• Mindful movement (basically a little wiggle around on my mat, super gentle though)

• Walking meditation

I appreciate that some of these are more active than others and might not appear restful, but it’s the focus and intention that makes them restful.

It’s the slowing down and allowing the busyness of life slip away for a brief moment.

For some people stillness is what they crave and can move to immediately.

For others they need some kind of slow and mindful movement to help to expel the excess energy and move toward stillness.

Slow down and take stock

Recently I have let things slip.

I’ve been busy with many projects and commitments, and learning new skills. And in that busyness I have forgotten to take care of myself. I have been working through lunch (which Argo my dog hates), rushing my time on my mat, and as a result feeling even more tired and overloaded.

While I am an advocate for yoga, mindfulness and general wellbeing, I am only human too. In taking care of others I can easily slip into doing mode, and I forget to stop and care of my needs. I think it happens to many of us, mother, wife, partner, friend, carer etc. We all have roles that put us in the position of holding responsibility for another person(s) needs, while also managing all the other facets of our ever evolving lives.

We are all more busy than ever. There are more demands on us, and people expect us to be on all the time.

But it’s ok.

Why?

While we might not be do stop the inevitable from happening, i.e. we get super busy and forget to take care of our own needs first, when we notice we can do something to rectify the situation.

I think this is so important. Otherwise it’s easy to end up in a spiral of shame or guilt, and that can shift us further away from changing things.

For me it’s about stopping and taking stock. Noticing what has shifted, and what I can change now to help shift the dial in the right direction.

For me it was taking the afternoon off, going for a long walk with Argo (like a good dog mama), followed by a bath with epsom salts, and then journalling. I use journalling to reflect and clear my head so that I can focus on what next.

So I made a commitment to myself of things that I would do to reset my supportive practices, and take care of myself.

Some of the things I have agreed to do are; long walks in nature with Argo in silence, putting my phone away at a certain time of the night, going to bed early (this one is huge for me), clearing enough time for my practices so they are not rushed, and time with friends.

Writing it down allows me to come back to it and to remind myself of what is important to my mental health and wellbeing.

If you have been feeling this way too, be compassionate with yourself, give yourself permission to stop and take stock. Then commit to making time for the things you need to help you feel strong, and grounded.

Do you remember the moment when you were transformed by yoga?

There are many moments I have felt transformed by yoga, it’s why I come back to my mat time after time. It’s why I trained as a yoga teacher over 10 years ago, and why I have continued to study yoga since then.

 So, when was the first time I felt transformed by yoga?

I would say it was the first time I stepped on to a mat, because from that moment on I was never the same.

But the moment I felt something shift in a way I had never experienced, was during a difficult time in my life. That was the moment I knew that this was more than just exercise, which up to that point it had felt like that for me.

I was travelling back to the UK after living abroad for almost four years, a move I did not desire, but that was happening none the less. I was in Thailand (part of my extended journey home – delaying the inevitable), and I was struggling with the transition. At the time I couldn’t see how this move could be good for me, it felt all wrong. I was leaving behind a life I thought I loved, and coming back to the unknown, not to mention a financial crash.

To add to everything my grandfather just had passed. I hadn’t seen him for four years. I was very close to him. I felt so much guilt for not being there before he died, and that I wouldn’t make the funeral.

I recall practising yoga on the top of a mountain, the decking of the retreat centre overlooked the Gulf of Thailand. As I moved through my practice, memories of my grandfather floated in and out of my consciousness. And mixed feelings about going home.

As I lay on the floor at the end of the class in Savasana I felt tears of sadness and joy wash over my cheeks. The weight of guilt I was carrying about my grandfather leaving me, and tears of joy for all the beautiful memories we had shared that still lived inside me and could never be taken away. In that moment I felt close to my grandfather, I could feel that no matter what he was always with me. And I knew that no matter what I would be okay, and I accepted the change that lay ahead.

That was the moment I felt changed by the practice in a way I never expected. After that moment my practice went from a few times a week to a daily practice.  I found a place I could come to and feel what I needed to feel.

Whether on or off my mat I could practice yoga, in the way I lived my life.

Yoga is unlike anything else I have ever experienced.

I gain deep insight and wisdom that can be applied to how I move through life.

I have gained many tools from this incredible system.

It is a sacred place.

Where I can move and feel everything I need to feel, and I can navigate life’s challenges.

I have come to know myself on a deeper level.

It’s why I keep coming back to my mat.

It’s why I love to share yoga.

New Year, New Perspective - 11 things I'm carrying forward into 2022

Last year was a really strange year. I struggled more in the last year than ever before, and I am just glad that I had people around me to reach out to when I needed support. 


I know I am not alone in feeling this way.


The pandemic is playing out in everyone's lives in different ways. We are all in unfamiliar territory. At times I have felt like the air was being sucked out of the tires making my journey slow and arduous. The constant change, and continued uncertainty has felt exhausting and anxiety producing.

In this uncertainty, I have found a new perspective on things, and bringing in the New Year was no exception. 

Normally, I would make grandiose statements like ‘this will be the best year ever’, and plan for the incredible things I want to do, and achieve. I would put so much pressure on myself to make this year bigger, and better.


The pandemic has been humbling, and grounding in ways that I can only see now, looking back in the rear view mirror.

I am still making plans, and setting goals, because it doesn't make sense to leave it all to chance, or my latest whim. 


The thing that feels different for me this time is my intention.

It might sound a little cliché, but I intend to live each day to the fullest. Treating each day like the most important day of the year. 

The thing is we can make all the pans we want, but if we live in the constant state of trying and sometimes struggling to achieve we miss the most precious moments. 

Not only that, but it’s an incredible pressure to make each year better, life has many twists and turns, and we simply don’t know what lies ahead. None of us do. All we can really do it live for this moment now, and appreciate it the journey, however bumpy the ride is at times.

As I reflected on my 2021, there were a few things that I decided were important for me to focus on as I move slowly and steadily into 2022.

1. Practice gratitude: Take time to soak in the things you are grateful for each day, especially on the really difficult days. This has been a practice that saved me many times this year. Share that sentiment of gratitude with other, whether you send a voice note, call or message, people need to hear how you make them feel.
   

2. Love with all your heart: My family know this about me, but I never end a call without saying ‘I love you’, I want the people I know to know it, I want them to know they are loved fully by me, even when we have an argument. Knowing you are loved is key to feeling safe and secure. So tell people what you mean to them.
   

3. Connect with the people you care about: Human connection is something we can’t survive without, and it can be a potent medicine in our healing, we have all experienced (in different levels) what it feels like to feel alone in this pandemic. So whenever you can, connect, take the time to really listen and be with the other person.
   

4. Forgive yourself and others. When we hold on to anger and resentment, it is a disservice to us, and a waste of our energy. You never truly know what is going on for another person, so even if you want to cut ties with the person, you can still forgive them and let them go fully. And as for forgiving ourselves, perhaps the hardest thing to do, this is an act of kindness, and will free you up to live your life fully, rather than beating yourself up.

5. You are stronger than you think: We all are. We have all gone through so much collectively and alone. Our struggles are our teachers, just like learning to ride a bike, we fall and get back up again that’s how we learn. We learn from the things that challenge us.

6. Live your truth: Be true to who you are, and stay in alignment with your values. Let this guide your way especially when you feel unsteady and uncertain. Knowing your values is key to living authentically, because only when you know your values can you chose the things that feel aligned and true for you.
   

7. Be vulnerable with people you trust: Let the people you trust really see you and lean into them when you need it. And reciprocate when then need you. Vulnerability is often seen as weak, but it takes enormous courage to truly be vulnerable with another soul.

8. Compassion is your friend: The practice of compassion is another that can be viewed as soft or a way of giving up. It’s not. It’s a skill to learn, as most of us aren’t taught to be kind to ourselves. And pushing harder, or doing more, pushing through feel like badges of honour. Compassion can also be fierce, we can vehemently stand up for what we need, this too is compassion.

9. Fill your own cup first: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Only when your well is full can you pour freely. We can’t help anyone if we are burnt out, exhausted, and irritable.

10. Play often: As adults we forget how important it is to play. We learn by playing, and our energy shifts when we play. We are never too old to play.

11. Do things that scare or challenge you: When we do the same things over and over we stagnate. When we do new things we create new neurological pathways, and it has been proven that we can learn until the day we die. Last year I started learning French, started rock climbing, learned a new design software and learned to code a little.

Why kindness matters

Saturday was World Kindness Day, and it got me to thinking about how much things have changed in the last 18 months.

Most of us have been through so much change and have probably felt like we don’t have much control over our lives. We may have felt frustrated, like we are not doing enough.

The last 18 months may have a lingering effect on us, and I believe that we need to be kind to ourselves. Why? Because it starts with us.

Most of us would like to think we are kind to others, but can we be kind to another if we are not able to be kind to ourselves?

You might think being kind is soft, it’s maybe even weak, but being kind doesn’t have to be soft, it can be fierce too.

It can be going to bed early when you are tired or making yourself some nourishing soup when you feel under the weather.

It can also be letting someone know that the way they spoke to us was unkind or going for a run to shake up your energy when you feel stuck in negative self-talk.

In particular, the inner self-talk can be the most pervasive form of cruelty we exact upon ourselves daily. Whether we tell ourselves we are too fat, old, unworthy, unskilled, stupid, unlovable, we all have our own brand of inner self-talk, ranging from nasty to downright wicked. This kind of cruelty can go unnoticed a background noise of unrelenting abuse that if left unchecked, and impact our mood, energy, and sleep.

“If you are continually judging and criticizing yourself while trying to be kind to others, you are drawing artificial boundaries and distinctions that only lead to feelings of separation and isolation.” Kristin Neff

So, it starts with us, shifting the way we treat ourselves.

How often do we treat ourselves differently from how we would a dear friend/loved one?

When your best friend tells you they are tried you wouldn’t tell them to go run a marathon, then work into the small hours of the night. You’d probably tell them to do what they can today and get some rest and start again fresh tomorrow.

When we are kind to ourselves it’s becomes easier to extend that kindness to others. Our experience of the pandemic may have left us feeling caution around other people in certain circumstances.

In situations where we might have helped a stranger with their heavy cases up a long flight of stairs we might think twice.

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel”. Maya Angelou

When we feel open and spacious it’s easier to be kind to others, but when unsure, tired, frustrated we tend to move away from social contact and connection.

Small acts of kindness can really affect not only our own mood, but other people's mood as well.

They don’t have to be massive things, maybe you let a mum and her hungry impatient children skip to the front of the queue. Or you let the person with one item skip in front of you in the queue as you have a full shopping cart. Or buy the person behind you a coffee.

In my experience this act of kindness is reciprocal.

The person receiving the kindness feels good, and you feel good too when that person thanks you or smiles back. You have a moment of connection, something we have all missed a great deal in the last 18 months.

Yes, it might delay our time by 10 minutes, but that good will is a beautiful gift to share.

“How do we change the world? One random act of kindness at a time” Morgan Freeman

And the more we practice kindness and compassion, the easier and more natural it becomes, until that energy expands like the tide rising. We feel willing and open the gift of kindness to other people, animals, plants, and our planet.

Sleeping Beauty

I've suffered with insomnia for as long as I can remember. 

My gran would say "Just put your head on the pillow and close your eyes, then go to sleep" , it would drive me crazy! Something that came so natural to her, eluded me and I felt frustrated.

I used to lie awake at night feeling lonely. I felt like I was the only person in the world who experienced sleep issues.

I recall a time at university where it was particularly bad. I had barely slept for days, and I was at my wits end. The flat I was living in at the time had a cat, and he was my only solace during those sleepless nights. This was before social media and speaking to someone in a different country and time zone was rather costly, so I couldn’t really reach out to someone to talk. It was just me and my thoughts. I remember thinking that there must be a reason why I couldn’t sleep, there had to be something wrong with me surely.

It wasn’t until many years later that I learned about my fathers sleeplessness, and met others who struggled like me.

I've had good and bad times with sleep.

In the bad times I’ve tried guided mentations, sleeping tablets, exercise, different foods, lotions, potions, sprays and oils. You name it I have probably tried it..………all that time and money, but nothing seemed to work for any length of time.

At one point in my life I thought not sleeping was a badge of honour. Phrases like “I’ll sleep when I am dead” and “Sleep is for the weak” are so common place in our society that I started to feel like I maybe not sleeping was cool. Not sleeping, and waking in the middle of the night wasn’t an obvious problem when I was younger as I could get through on caffeine and youth, but lack of sleep became more of a problem as I aged.

What I have learned over the years is that certain things will trigger my sleep disturbances, specific things will help me get to sleep and if I wake up I can get back to sleep with simple practices. I’ve learned that I’m very sensitive, and what I do during my day affects the likelihood of a quality nights rest.

Recently I was fortunate enough to take a Sleep Recovery™ course that further healed my relationship to sleep.

Here are my key takeaways from my years of sleep disturbance and Sleep Recovery™:

• What you do during the day is just as important as cultivating quality bedtime habits.

• There is no such thing as a good sleeper, versus bad sleeper. We need to discover what is right for our needs. For example someone might sleep 7 hours a night and wake feeling bright and energised, yet someone else might need 10 hours to feel the same way.

• Our energy levels will fluctuate through the day, and we can manage them with simple practices.

• Listen to the subtle signals of your body, when you feel the signs of sleepiness, provided you can, make your way to bed.

• We all have a sleep type and there are certain tools that work well depending on your sleep type.

• We can’t switch our minds off, so we need to find days of dealing with things that pile up in our mind throughout the day.

When we have sleep issues it can feel frustrating, not to mention it affects our cognition, and has been related to a variety of health concerns and diseases.

“Sleep problems constitute a global epidemic that threatens health and quality of life for up to 45% of the world's population” (World Sleep Day)

It’s fair to say that at some point in our lives we might experience sleep disturbances, and for some of us this may be fleeting. However, things like menopause, stress, massive changes in your life such as divorce, childbirth, moving home to name a few could elicit a change to your sleep.

So it is something worth spending time and effort on since it affects our quality of life and health.

If you have sleep issues, such as not sleeping, waking in the middle of the night and not being able to get back to sleep or waking up not feeling refreshed have a look at my website, for upcoming Sleep Recovery™ courses or book a private sleep session with me.

Why movement matters

I think it’s fair to say that many of us are sitting more than normal, not just with our jobs, but now with the global pandemic and multiple lockdowns we have nowhere to go, so what can we do, sit down read, or maybe watch some T.V.

You might ask why does that matter?

Glad you asked!

Basically, our body needs stress. what I mean by this is stressing our joints, and tissues so that they stay healthy and responsive. 

Now as always there is a spectrum.

You can over work and stress the joints and tissue. Think about repetitive strain where you make the same movement again and agin, and eventually end up injured. Or in the case of athletes who are putting their bodies through extreme stress, demand and load.

Slightly embarrassed to say this, but I watched a documentary on Netflix about cheerleaders called ‘Cheer’.

Why I’m sharing this is because this is a good example of extreme load and stress. They put their bodies through such demanding and rigorous routines, they ended up with cracked ribs, broken elbows, and severe sprains some of which they continued to work through all for the love of their sport. If you’ve watched it too, you’ll know what I mean it’s crazy what they do!

On the other end of the spectrum though we can have a lack of movement. When we don’t move enough we loose muscle strength and tone, and we even atrophy of the muscles, making us weaker. When there is weakness we are more prone to injury. Many people suffer from back, hip, shoulder pain nowadays, and a lot can be attributed to sitting at desks for long hours, and not enough movement.  

This is why we need to move, and have a good mix of movement types, which includes strength work (especially as we age) and lengthening and loading the tissues throughout a range of different movements. 

What this means is we want to try to move when we can, and ideally lots of little mini movement sessions throughout our day.  

Whether that’s a long hike outside, dancing to your favourite tunes for 30 minutes, a HIIT session, yoga, or taking 10 minutes to move at your desk a few times throughout the day! Increasing our movement does wonders for our physical body and there are benefits to our mental health too.

How much movement we need?

Well, firstly our bodies are designed to move, before computers and desk jobs we worked in agriculture, lifting, pushing, pulling, pressing, jumping, climbing and running and more. We didn’t need to create artificial exercise to move. We moved all day long. Our brain is there to allow us to move and engage with the world. It’s how we connect with others, and interact with our environment.

So what’s the magic number I hear you ask?

There are studies that suggest 60 minutes, others 20-40 minutes. While I think averages and statistics can be helpful, I would suggest finding movement activities that you enjoy and doing that rather than forcing yourself to exercise for a set period of time. In most cases we loose motivation to keep going pretty quickly if we don’t enjoy the activity.

It’s also important to move your body in lots of different ranges of movement. Think about a simple task of reaching for a high shelf in your kitchen. If you never reach your arm over head, eventually as you age, it will become a struggle to make this move with ease.

Equally, if you have an injury, severe stress, depression, or health concerns you will need to work with your medical care providers to figure out what would be optimal for you and what movements you can do, and what to avoid.

So injuries, and health concerns aside.

How much movement do we need? From the studies 60-20 minutes is enough. I would say that it’s not about a magic number, but about finding ways to integrate movement into our everyday so that it becomes a part of daily life. Think about movement as a way to have fun and interact with the world.

Especially considering movement has been shown to help us:

• Feel well, physically and emotionally

• Function productively

• Think, learn and remember

• Interact with the world

• Communicate and express ourselves

• Connect and build relationships with others.

Just like getting a balanced diet for our health, we should consider a balanced movement diet too.

When we move we tend to feel better in our body and mind, and when we don’t pain and inflammation arises which stops us enjoying life to the fullest.

Self-care sabotage

I have been thinking a lot about self-care over the last few months and what this really means, and wanted to share some of it with you.

There are numerous podcasts out there talking about and offering wellness and self-care advice, which is GREAT! We need more of this in our lives.

However, this got me to thinking, what is behind it all. We know that going to bed early, eating well and taking time out for ourselves is beneficial to our wellbeing. So why is it so hard to do?

I think there can be MANY reasons, but some that I have identified in my research and I feel most connected to are

• feeling that we are not enough

• learned behaviour from family

• when I stop my mind becomes too busy with worry or to do list

• not able to say no or set clear boundaries

• being a people pleaser

The last two I believe are linked to a lack of self-worth or not enough-ness.

It can feel seriously overwhelming to go from 0 to 100 by setting our self the mammoth task of having better self-care everyday, and being perfect at it. To make matters worse if we don't do it one day it can feel like we have failed in some way, even though we know that failure is not a bad thing, as we learn so much from our failings (will save this for another email!).

So, what if we start with the small and easily manageable things?

An example of this was when I first started a home yoga practice I thought I had to practice for 90 minutes a day to be a '"good yogi", and as you can imagine life quickly got in the way, and I began to dislike doing my practice as it felt rushed, and I just didn't have time. In fact if I didn't have time I'd not practice at all as this was not enough, I'd then spend the entire day berating myself for it. I got extremely disheartened for not practicing ENOUGH. Until one day I made the decision that I would go to my mat everyday, and I would be there for as long as I wanted to be there, no judgement. I would practice enjoying and taking pleasure from my yoga practice - however brief it was. Soon after that I noticed a huge change, I was enjoying my practice again, and I was practicing everyday. Even the days I had less time, I would just jump on my mat and move for as long as I could, and felt good.

Why? I think it was down to the fact that there was no expectation. I was doing this for my love of yoga, and even more important for my love of me. It felt good to move my body, but it didn't feel good to move my body when I was just going through the motions because I felt I had to in order to meet some expectation.

This is the same for our self-care routine/ritual, if we are just doing these things because we feel we need to then there will always be an element of resistance with it. The way we treat ourself needs to come from a place of love, and an idea of pleasure or enjoyment, not from the "should" in our heads.

Whatever your self-care routine is or isn't right now try starting from where you are at, make a conscious decision to do the things that make you feel utterly wonderful. Be realistic too, and don't set unrealistic expectations for yourself only to feel like you have failed.

Most importantly, however, you deserve to feel good, in fact you deserve to feel absolutely amazing! Your self-care is not about meeting a quota, or achieving a goal it's about a way of life. It's about knowing that you deserve to have an early night, or that you don't have to stay late at work every evening, help your friend when you're tired, tidy the bathroom (insert your favourite here) to prove you are good enough, and worth taking care of.

We know that when we are feeling good and our cup is full, we are the best version of ourself. We can love 💗 and connect our friends and family, enjoy our time off by creating lasting memories and truly be present.

Take a moment now to think about what your self-care means to you and what will bring you the most joy, then do it! But remember, if you miss a day, week or longer, be kind to yourself, and start right where you are.

Self-Doubt vs Self-Belief

Have you ever felt like you know so much about your subject matter, but at the same time you don’t know enough? And that not knowing makes you doubt yourself. I mean there is always someone who knows more than you, right? When in these situations, it is so easy to spiral into the negative self-doubt talk, which can start as simple as, this person know’s more than me about x, before long that turns into I’m not intelligent, pretty, thin, strong (insert your word here) enough, and we loose our will and determination to keep going. Self-doubt takes over.

We doubt ourselves, why? Well one reason is that as humans we have a predisposition to negativity, we are 10 times more likely to see, and remember the bad things versus that good and positive things in our life.

But what about those people you admire? What do they do or have that is different?

After observing people who are successful (an not just in a monetary sense) in their job or field, I think one key factor is at play.

They believe in their mission.

Mission might feel like a strong word, but it’s true. They believe that what they do will make some sort of difference. They will change the world in some way. They could be a hairdresser/fashion designer trying to make people look/feel good, they teach, because they believe that knowledge is vital and their subject matter is important. Think about people you know who are successful, it’s highly likely they believe in what they do, and that belief most likely translates into self-belief.

It’s not to say that these people don’t ever have moments of self-doubt, but they believe in what they are trying to achieve, and that brings clarity and focus. So much so that it overrides and outweighs that negatively bias, because they need to share this mission with everyone.

So, what do you want to do? What is important to you?

Fear a darkroom where negatives develop

Fear can be a both a great motivator and debilitating force. It can quite literally stop us in our tracks. On some occasions fear will propel us forward. For example, when facing a new challenge, or path, giving us energy and momentum to do something differently. Other times we will get caught up in our internal dialogue, and procrastinate about our decision or challenge. If we do get caught up in the internal dialogue then most likely we will be left feeling anxious, frustrated and irritated.

When our fear is a catalyst for change it is very powerful. We may start a new business, change career or follow our dream to travel the world. Our fear of things how they are currently, and not living our dreams can be a huge and scary motivator for change, taking us to new and interesting places in our personal discovery. While it is possible we could end up regretting our decision completely, we will have gained is knowledge. Maybe we will learn that we need to do it differently next time or that the thing we chose it wasn’t right for us. But a least we would have grown and evolved.

However, when we feel that fear, and sit and do nothing there can be a sense of anger and frustration. We will probably look at other people (who are doing what we want to do) and criticise them, or more likely we will criticise our self for not being brave, or clever enough, or whatever you internal chatter sounds like. This is when our little gremlins take over and the inner critic goes wild, this is too powerful and if you let it, it will take over.

So how do we fight the urge to flee or stand still? What is it that makes us tackle our fear, and step into our power?

Well deep inside our gut, we know the right course of action, but often we block it out with the external noise of other people's opinions, or ignore it completely. Our body knows the truth, when we listen to our intuition, but our mind needs to get with the program. Simply put our mind needs to catch up. However, it’s not that simple, you see our mind has been designed to keep us safe. So if we consider doing something that is a little risque for example quitting our job to start a new business, our mind will throw in all sorts of reasons why we shouldn’t do it, and for good reason. It wants to protect us for getting it wrong, or doing something that will compromise the status quo, and turf us right out of our comfort zone. While this is a good thing, in that it will keep us out of serious harm, it can paralyze us and stop us from living our dreams and passions.

So how do we get over this and what can we to move through the fear?

1. Start to take some deep breaths, and feel your feet on the ground and listen to your own intuition and get clear about what you want. When your mind starts to interfere stop take a deep breath and count backwards from 5 to reset your thought pattern.

2. Do your research. If you are making a big decision then you want to know all the information, so that you have the best chance of success. Know what you need to learn, buy or consider doing to help you with this project.

3. Try not to listen too much to other people’s advice. While they mean well it is likely they will have their own bias or experience which will frame their thinking. Choose who you solicit advice from. You want to understand where that person is coming, and what their skills are so you can filter out what’s relevant.

4. Recognise when your negativity bias kicks in. Although our brain is programmed to keep us safe, often it can been too risk averse. Recognising that there are things you can control and things you can’t. Work to control the things in your power, and then worry less about the rest.

5. Take small steps. If you were going to climb Everest you wouldn’t just rock up and start climbing without any prep, or the right tools or reading up on the climb. So take small action steps to prepare you for your new and exciting journey.

6. Be true to who you are, follow your dreams, and after all that prepare to take the plunge. Even if it doesn’t work out the way you think, you will be glad that you tried and developed from the journey. If it does work out, well you might just kick yourself for not doing it sooner!